I Do...

"Oh they say when you marry in JUUUUUUUUNE, you'll alwaaaaaays beeeeeeee...A bride!" (If you sang this and knew that this came from the 1954 musical- "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers," you are OFFICIALLY my kinda people!)

It is officially that time of season. Social media is flooded with so many people accepting marriage proposals, having bridal showers, getting married and even having vow renewals. I love this season! The air is filled with the celebration of love, and I am HERE for ALLLL of it. Flood my mailbox and inboxes with all of the invites and gift registries (preferably from Amazon & Target...j/s)!

I think I had my wedding plans complete by the time I was 10 years old. The wedding dress has evolved since then from puffed sleeves and oversized head dress veils, and the songs have changed, but the core parts of my wedding has been planned for a little over 30 years! I've always wanted to get married in the morning and have a breakfast / brunch wedding reception. I want a night of worship the night before my wedding. So, I have been dreaming about the day that love would come knocking on my door and it would be my time to fill social media with my celebration of love. But, God other plans. I'm at a place now that I am rethinking my dreams. Are there remnant of the cult still lurking in my dreams and desires? Is my desire for marriage connected my upbringing- being taught that marriage and family was a woman's first and ONLY calling? Is this desire a learned behavior? I DON'T KNOW... God led me to destroy every plan and stop praying over my husband...

WUT-HA-HAPPEND-WUZ....

Recently, I was at a conference and God revealed to me that this desire for love has turned to idolatry. It was a foot hold that the devil was using to get to question God's plan, value and provision for my life. I had to surrender. I walked the aisle as soon as Nicole C. Mullins gave the invitation. During Jackie Hill Perry's altar invitation, I re-aligned myself with the fact that my body is not mine, it is Christ's and being surrendered is giving up the right to decide which God's precepts I was going to follow. It's God's way over my will. I re-dedicated myself to my Savior. I also dedicated my life to follow Christ.

I had no clue what was next!---SO MUCH CHANGE...

Immediately, God placed me out of a good, flourishing and healthy ministry to a new place. God brought me through VSG surgery, changing my eating habits. He has brought people in my life that won't let me be complacent. In my new church, I am around strong female women of faith that will boldly affirm me while perfecting the calling of God on my life

Recently, I was reading my Bible, and I came across the very that said I am bought with a price, therefore I am supposed to GLORIFY God in my body. I have always thought this meant in purity. Chile, before I could get my spiritual pen out and place a checkmark over that verse, the Holy Spirit G A T H E R E D me!!!! Holy Spirit said, everytime you choose health over your flesh, you are glorifying God in your body. Every day that you submit to the doctor's orders and walk the 2 miles he ordered, you are surrendering your will to me. "Whew...okay...Welp..." So these chips, I was about to eat..went into the trash, and I set my alarm to go off reminding me that my time in the gym was way more than just a workout. It was obedience and submission to God over my flesh. The increase and reward belongs to God. Done!---right??? Nah- God had more!

I am in a Bible study about Ruth. I truly thought this was going to be a super dope study chronicling the love story between Ruth and Boaz. Like, I was literally getting my special markers together so that I could write, "And they lived happily every after..." at the end of my Bible study journal! The more that I study the book of Ruth, the more I see something deeper: The sovereignty of God-the Love story is between me and God!

So all that time I listened to single women pray for God to bring them their "Boaz (Sidenote-I may have prayed that a time or two...or 300+ IDK)...I was waaaaaay off! While Boaz and Ruth ended up together..."Boaz" is a representation of a person of power, provision and protection---(If you immediately thought of our generous and loving Savior---"ding-ding...you are correct!")

Through this study, Kelly Minter pulled out the point that God has called each of us to be a "Boaz" to people who are different than us. We are to show kindness and generosity to those who are without. The poor, sick and marginalized people belong at our table! God is looking for people willing to lay down our greatest desires, and their status- to follow God.

Just when I thought I was completely surrendered, God brought to my heart my inner-most desire: love, marriage & family.

"But God, YOU said this was my Marrying Season," I wailed in my heart,

"God, I thought that when I gave up marriage at the Generations Conference, you were going to surprise me with Denzel-Jason-Idris-Lenny-Jonathan Majors!!!!! Like, I seriously thought that was the twist because that was the story of every single person (35+ years old) that I knew..."

You know,- "As soon as I stopped looking...I ran into them..."

But in that moment, God showed me that He is not generic. He has a plan that is beyond my own vision. My mind is too small to even comprehend what he has in store for me.

On June 19, 2023, I accepted my Sovereign, Loving and Good God's proposal, with a hearty "I DO" to His perfect will. I GAVE UP my deepest and most desired plans. I chose to walk in complete-complete surrender to God. I have no clue what the future holds. I DO know who holds my future (it sound corny, but it is powerfully my truth right now) I DO know that He will NEVER leave me nor forsake me. I DO know that He loves me with an everlasting love! I DO know that my name is etched on his heart. I DO that He has a plan for me that is above all that I could ever ask or think--according to HIS power that is now working in me! I DO know I am covered in His protection and can freely submit to Him.

God is not my boyfriend or husband (LOL--CRINGE).

God is my Lord & Savior-He is my Kinsman Redeemer (my source) who sent the Gospel to take over my spirit and join me in covenant with His will. He set me at his table and fed me with his over-abundant provision. He spoke a Word of protection over me so that I can walk through my fears to His calling. Therefore, I am willing to do whatever, go wherever and be whoever He says. My trust is in Him.

I could go into so many things God did to secure this covenant between myself and His will--I'd love to go out for coffee and tell you all the ways. For now, all I can say is "I DO."

Now my song is, "So they say when you surrender to CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIST, You'll Alwaaaaaaays Beeeeeeeeeee.....IDK.....

To Be Continued....

Revelation 19:6 -10

Then I heard something like the voice of a vast multitude, like the sound of cascading waters, and like the rumbling of loud thunder, saying,

Hallelujah, because our Lord God, the Almighty, reigns! Let us be glad, rejoice, and give him glory, because the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his bride has prepared herself. She was given fine linen to wear, bright and pure.

For the fine linen represents the righteous acts of the saints. Then he said to me, “Write: Blessed are those invited to the marriage feast of the Lamb!” He also said to me, “These words of God are true.”Then I fell at his feet to worship him, but he said to me, “Don’t do that! I am a fellow servant with you and your brothers and sisters who hold firmly to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God, because the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.”

If you would like to read: Ruth: Love, Loss and Legacy: https://a.co/d/i6nrmyn

If you don't know Jesus as your Lord, Savior and Friend- Please reach out, I'd love to sit down and talk to you...